These Nights

Some nights are easier than others. Some nights I’m just so thankful for the sun to be rising so we can make our way downstairs and out of the tangle of blankets, stuffed animals and bedtime stories left under the covers. Stretching sore necks that never found that nestled-in-feeling of a lovely sleep. On those mornings, coffee is the one thing that I am truly inspired to make happen. But some nights are magical. Even though I’m still up nursing, comforting, rearranging or even just letting my mind roam during the dark hours, there is something entrancing about that time together. I cover up Luca with his animal print flannel (as he has kicked it off for the third time) and notice how beautiful his gold hair is in the dark. I can just barely make out Rose’s sweet moon face snug inside her blanket cocoon. Somehow Stirling, our eight year old cat, has crept into a fold of the blankets at my feet. Sandy seems always to be in a deep sleep. I’m amazed at how quickly he can go there. But he wakes up just as easily as I do if a little one cries out. I do most of the “getting back to sleep”, but I’m thankful that we share the night like this in one big bed (and a little one pushed up along side). Going from husband and wife, to husband, wife, son and daughter has been a shift to say the least! Beautiful and demanding. Nighttime is now a whole different experience. Gone (for now) are the nights of eight hour straight sleeps. But I’m so grateful to have chosen this way – this sharing of the night. It is a time out of time, but it grounds us and knits us together. A couple of weeks ago I started drawing our bed and it’s hourly change-up in my sketch journal. From those sketches this piece has started to emerge. As I said, many nights are hard, but I know I’ll look back at this time years from now and feel only gratitude. Life is so fleeting. Being together through all the hours of our days and nights is a beautiful thing to share.   

 

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